The Road Between Faith and Trust

Last night, I heard a line in a movie that really resonated with me. "Faith gets it's power through the struggle". Boy is that the truth! Faith just isn't really necessary when life is comfortable. It's easy to trust and believe when things are great. It's when the going gets tough that our belief is challenged. I think belief is faith. I think trust is faith. I mean, you trust in what you believe, right? The word trust makes me think of one of those heavy duty locks. You know, the kind that cannot be broken without the key. I guess I see that in my minds eye because, in my life, as my faith has grown, my feeling of security has grown. I have shared with you lots of times about my desperate need to feel safe. Not trusting was the result of my frantic search for that safety. Nothing and no one could be trusted, I told myself, and so I never found that safety...until I started leaning into Jesus.

I never would have admitted to lacking faith. In my mind, faith and trust were not the same. Maybe that's because I was picking and choosing what areas of life to have faith in. I mean, I had faith in God's ability to heal the sick, even raise the dead. I saw various kinds of miracles growing up, so I never doubted God could do  those things. I believed completely that Jesus had rescued me from eternal death and would save anyone that asked. Sharing my heart's deep secrets with him was a different story. If you have suffered any kind of betrayal in your life you are probably already shouting an "amen!" as you read because you understand! When we suffer betrayal, the first instinct is to close our heart and not trust..to close our heart to faith. Well, that was my first instinct anyway. Like I said though, I didn't see my inability to trust as a lack of faith. I separated the two. Now, I see that idea as completely flawed.

I looked up the definition for the word faith. Faith: complete trust or belief in something. I looked up the definition for trust. Trust: firm belief in the reliability of something. Do you see how the two are intertwined? How in the world can I tell Jesus I have faith in everything he says he is, and not trust him with even the darkest corners of my heart? I realize now, that all those years of blindness that I walked through, it wasn't that I had no faith, it was that I had little faith. In fact, ironically, in my lack of faith I still found that I clung to that little faith I had in Jesus because I had no other hope. Desperation will do that to you. It wasn't until I found myself wanting to be completely restored that I saw holes in my faith and an inability to trust. See, it takes some faith, some trust, to believe that Jesus is the savior of your soul, but it takes a whole lot more faith to believe that he forgives the past, heals the wounds and makes us like new. I had no idea how much my faith would grow when I started opening the windows of my heart and letting his light seep in.

So, if faith and trust are intertwined, then it makes total sense that "faith get's it's power through the struggle". Our faith only grows out of adversity. When that faith grows, our ability to trust in Jesus grows. Neither of those come to us overnight. I am in a place right now of fighting my flesh that wants to jump ahead or figure things out. Jesus has laid out some events in my life that require complete and total belief in him for the good to come forth. My faith is being stretched and my trust in him is being refined. Isn't it funny how we are so quick to make statements like "I believe in God" or "I trust God", but when the rubber meets the road, our first reaction to uncertainty is panic! How quickly I forget to believe in him who has rescued me!

 If trust can be compared to a lock, then the bottom line is that someone has to have the key. We all have locks on our heart, but each "heart lock" comes with a key. Who holds your key? Honestly, the only one we can trust completely to never loose the key, or give it away, is our creator, our father, our savior. I had to have faith to hand that key over. I had to truly believe what I heard him telling me in order to trust him with that key. My faith has grown and with it an overwhelming desire to just throw my hands up and say "okay, you're in charge God." Of course my silly mind forgets sometimes that I am throwing it all in his hands and I try to take it back and figure it out but he is patient. He is consistent in his word, consistent in his love and you know something else really, really cool I have found? In my trusting him more, he has blessed me with the mission of spreading his story of restoration to others. He allows me to sit here and write to you every week because he believes in me, because he trusts me to carry on his good name. That is pretty cool!

So, I challenge you friends, face the struggle so your faith will gain power. When your faith grows, trust will follow. I know how hard it is to take those first steps. They seem too big, too impossible but that is what faith is all about. Believing in the impossible, trusting the unseen. Jesus can be trusted!! I am so thankful that he has never let me down. There were times, and probably still are, that I forget how certain my future is with him, but I know deep, deep down in my soul that I can trust him with my life. Why do you hold back? What stops your faith from growing? Lay it at his feet! Trust him with your past, your present and your future. He won't turn his back...ever.

"Let me hear of your unfailing love each morning, for I am trusting you. Show me where to walk, for I give myself to you." Psalms 143:8

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