No Secret, No Shame
Wow! What an amazing weekend I had! I had the chance to share with sixty some women about my journey through healing and the miracles God has worked for me and in me. I must say, the results were jaw dropping. Of course I know what God's word says. "He works all things for good", but we don't always see that so clearly at work in our lives. I saw it this past weekend. I saw it so clearly that I could barely contain the joy I felt. In my authenticity and transparency, God was lifted up and women came to me saying they had hope that God would heal their hearts too. Like I said...wow.
I was thinking about why, until recently, it's been such a struggle to be authentic and transparent. Why did secrecy about my past, my pain seem so necessary? Once I shared so openly and saw the result, well, it seemed silly to me that I had tried for so many years to guard my secrets. I know exactly why I held back for so long. All I ever saw before me was my own reputation, my own insecurity at stake. It never occurred to me that maybe if I opened up God would get the recognition, the honor. I wish I could describe for you the freedom I felt once I was finished.
"I have no more secrets" I thought as I walked away from the stage.
"You have no shame" was the whisper I heard from Jesus himself.
He's right, you know? I have no shame. I only have his grace and redemption to speak of. It's not that he ever did put shame on me, he just isn't like that, but secrets speak of shame. We only hide what we are ashamed of. Secrets keep us in bondage. Our God is not a God of secrets. Do you believe that? I see now that God wants me to be transparent because, well, that's what he is. He laid it all out there for the world to see. He took on himself the shame of this world and that is why he whispers, "you have no shame". If I trust his word, then I will not hide. If I trust his work on the cross, then I feel no need to hold back.
It was so cool to literally feel the pleasure of my God as I spoke of the pain, and the healing. It was just like that feeling that comes from getting a pat on the back from your boss for a job well done. Except this "feel good" is a deep down in my soul security. I can feel the arms of my God totally surrounding me and I believe, yes, I believe that I am safe with him.
Believe me I know how hard it is, how scary it is to walk into the light, to share the secrets, the pain. I know that until God does his work, the insecurity feels overwhelming, the fear seems impossible. My challenge to you is to open your heart and mind to him. He may not be a God of secrets, but he will whisper right to the secret places of your life. You will find freedom in him. You will find hope in him. You will find a relationship that just can't be found on this earth. I love how close I am to my Savior now because of what we have been through together. He knows the things about me that I cannot even express in words. He is the only one that has been there from day one. Whether good or bad, he has walked with me and I love him for it.
So, what will you do with your secrets? There is no shame in being authentic! There is no shame in looking others in the eye and saying "let me tell you what God has redeemed in me". I know there will still be moments when I will be tempted to hide, but no more! I pray every area of my life is always exposed to his light and I pray others can be drawn to him because of it. Truly, he works all things out for good..his good and mine. Thank you, papa, for making all things good in me.
"and we know that God causes EVERYTHING to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purposes for them." (Romans 8:28 NLT)