Weakness is not meant to be hidden. This struggle has by far been my hardest. I'm having to "unlearn" all my ideas about being tough and strong and a problem solver. The place too start in this journey of weakness is at the Cross. The cross is a public display of my weakness, not my ability to be perfect. For so long, I equated salvation with perfection. "God has saved me and so I owe it to him to try really hard to not mess up." was the center of my relationship with him. This meant, no matter how hard it was, that I must never look weak.

Whatever was hard to handle was hidden away.

Now, looking back at the years I kept it all inside and pretended to be perfect, I realize that I was exhausted...all the time. Maybe it sounds crazy to you, but I have found that being real and honest is refreshing. Hiding made me weary; always trying to protect myself from this or that. The result of my effort to be perfect was insecurity.

The result of my effort to be perfect was insecurity.

Why? Well, it's simple really. I will never be perfect and trying to be breeds fear. I was afraid. I was afraid of telling the truth, afraid of messing up, afraid of letting my guard down. Wow. I can't even believe those things describe me now. Here I am writing for only God knows how many about just how imperfect I am.

Thank you Jesus.

To embrace Jesus is to embrace imperfection, like it or not. The miraculous thing about embracing Jesus is that he makes this imperfection beautiful. Remember, He is strong in your weakness. There has not been a "magic formula" in my journey of learning to be authentic. The only thing I have done is learned to listen really closely to his voice...and trust it. When he calls me to be authentic, I obey. It's not easy, I still feel afraid sometimes of what might happen, but I trust His love more than my fear and so...I obey.

Not sure who needs to hear this one today, but I believe some of you are walking around with burdens you were meant to throw at the foot of the Cross and instead, you hide them, hold them close or even try to ignore them. None of those tactics work, friends. I tried them all. The only way to be whole is to expose it all. Every single imperfect detail. God already knows it all anyway. We are not surprising him with our honesty. He asks us to display our weakness so he can show us how much he loves us.

I have never felt more loved in my life.

Every time God works through the ugly, scary, weak parts of my life, it reminds me that He must love me to do that for me.

He loves you too.

His love is free. Perfection is not required. Imperfection is welcome. Can you see yourself laying it all down before him? Can you see how maybe, if you let him, he might be strength in your weakness? He will delight in doing so.

I serve a perfect God, who loves imperfect people.

He loves imperfect people...perfectly.

 "I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me trustworthy, appointing me to his service. Even though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief. The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus."
(1 Tim. 1:12-14)


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