It's Okay To Ask
Asking for help has always been a struggle for me. I spent so many years striving and working to be enough that the last thing that comes naturally to me is asking for help.
Especially from God.
It feels odd that the maker of the universe wants to talk with me and hear what is on my heart. It is even more odd that he wants to give me whatever resources I need, that he wants to fill the weakness in me with his strength. I have a hunch that I'm not alone in this. I think many of us struggle with being in deep relationship with our King and believing that we have unlimited access to him and his resources.
I'm finding there are a few lies I've believed for a long time that tend to stop me from asking for help. Rather than walk boldly through the gates of Heaven into the presence of my King, I see myself peering through those locked gates, wishing I could get on the other side. Maybe you'll recognize some of these lies as familiar, too...
Am I worthy?
That is the first lie to be defeated. I am made worthy by his love. It can't be more or less than that. I can only accept by faith that when he looks at me, he sees a beautiful, purified soul. When I conquer this lie, many other lies start to fall away. Believing I am worthy changes everything.
What if my heart is wrong in the asking?
This is a biggie. I am always worried that in asking for something I'm being selfish, or greedy. What I'm learning about childlike faith is that it is pure. It doesn't worry about how the request will be received, it simply asks. If I ask something and my heart does happen to be misguided, He will not respond to me in anger. He will ask me why I want that and then through conversation with him I will discover any hidden motives. If I never ask, I will never have those conversations. So, crazy as it sounds, it's okay to ask even if I question my own motive. He will guide me through my own heart and show me what I need to see. That right there is revolutionary...at least to me. :)
Aren't I supposed to just work for it, or figure it out?
There is this great, eternal truth that the King knows about me: I are only human! I am not my own god. I am not all powerful. I will never have all the resources at my disposal because I worked hard for them. Do I have to plow the field at times, and do the hard things? Absolutely, I do. But even in the plowing there will come moments when my resources are not enough. In those moments, I can freely ask for what I don't have or know.
This particular aspect of asking has become very personal for me, lately. I realized recently that God has put specific resources in my hands. I've had these resources for awhile now but rather than ask him how to use them, I let my lack of knowledge overwhelm me. So I didn't do much with them, for a long while. When I finally surrendered and said, "Jesus, I need your intellect! I don't know how to do this!" he was swift with his answers. I can't explain it any other way except to say that he started downloading ideas and led me to specific places where I could find the answers I needed.
Suddenly, the resources I have are bursting at the seems with the power to have an impact for His kingdom.
There is an if in all of this. The "if" is that if I am seeking first his kingdom, everything I need in that seeking will be added to me. Jesus said so in his word (Matt. 6). When my heart yearn for him, he will bestow to me every good thing I need..and beyond what I need.
And then, to sum all this up is the one thing that I would say is the hardest reality to take in, at least for me.
Sometimes, the King will lavish gifts on me just because he loves me.
I buy Christmas gifts for my kids not because they earn them but for the sheer pleasure of watching them receive the gift. Friends, our King is no different. He will, at times, surprise us with gifts just for the sheer pleasure of watching us open them. He has done that for me before and every time, I have been overwhelmed by a deep sense of his love for me.
"You would give me this just because?" I ask, incredulous.
"You bet, I would!" he says, with a jolly laugh and warm embrace.
He is not looking to just meet our needs. He is looking to exceed our expectations. I admit, that one is very hard for me to comprehend. A king loves me that much? Indeed, he does. Not just me, but you too, friend.
Mind you, this is no prosperity sermon. This is no get rich quick scheme, either. This is about recognizing the reality that the King of the universe is beside us every single day, yearning to meet our every need, and then some.
So, we must ask, friends. We must overcome these lies and fears and we must come running into our King's presence, like kids on Christmas morning, and ask him for what we need.
The world needs to see that the King we serve is good and generous, and that his love is tangible.
Let it start with you and me; children running into his presence and asking him for everything we need.